Magnets on the Fridge

When I recently moved into my own little space for the first time in 5 years, I couldn't find my refrigerator magnets. I knew I had kept a few tucked away somewhere, but that somewhere was not to be found.

This past Saturday I had time to organize a bit more and came across Christmas cards and photos of family and friends sent during the Christmas season. Again I tried to locate the missing magnets so that I could attach these photos to my fridge as prayer reminders. After wracking my brain and looking in the same places a second or third time, I gave up and ordered these really fun little magnetic balls, like I had seen at my son's house in Arizona.

Yesterday as I was helping my Mom put away her winter clothes, I walked into the back bedroom closet and saw a small blanket and a poncho of mine. Oh yeah! I do still have a few things over here. I think there's a box or two under the bed. Down on my belly with my head under the bed,  I spied a small box with "Kindle" on it and a memory was stirred....magnets! Sure enough, there they were. I was so excited!

It may seem strange that I would be so excited about magnets, but most of these were handmade by a very dear elderly friend of mine who has since gone on to be with Jesus. I had even forgotten all about them, but evidently in the back of my mind I knew they were there and that's why I wanted to find them so badly. Memories of Don handing me a pile of different magnets flooded my mind and heart. "These are my uglies," he said as he handed me the little lady faces with kerchiefs on their corncob heads. He had also made owls from pine cones & twigs, a lady bug, a pipe-cleaner insect, and a cotton-ball chicken. They make me smile and bring back fond memories of my good friend.

Then there is the pair of dugongs. A momento that Mike and I purchased after going with his father to a dugong farm in Florida during our boys spring break one year. I was fascinated by these large, gentle creatures and this magnet reminds me of a fun time with my family on a rare vacation, seeing something new.

Another favorite is the one sent from missionary friends of ours that's sort of like a snow globe only it holds black sand and tiny sea shells from the Tasman Sea in New Zealand. There are magnets from a Vacation Bible School our boys attended, "got milk?" from my parent's farm, a cute stick figure girl that was attached to a card years ago, and one that shows an adult hand and the very tiny hand of an unborn child reminding me that all life is precious from the moment of conception whether we can see it or not.

The new magnetic balls arrived and I had fun playing with them while trying to put them to use. They are strong and were rather attached to each other! With 50 balls, I was able to attach all the photos to the refrigerator and scattered my treasured magnets on various surfaces throughout the kitchen. Now my place really feels like home with my refrigerator and other surfaces covered with old friends (magnets & photos!) It's like receiving good news from far away places.

Proverbs 25:25

"Like cold water to a weary soul

is good news from a distant land."

Stories of Joy

I'm going to be honest today. I've been struggling lately. Anxiety threatens to take me under at times. My husband is declining and there is nothing I can do about it. He fell Friday night, again. Has cuts and bruises, again.

My bright spot this week is simple and very personal.

Due to Mike's fall, I had a long talk with the head nurse at the facility where he is a resident. She started telling me how much they loved Mike and that she brought her dog to specifically visit him one day. Then she said that last week Mike was reading the Bible out loud to the other residents in the dining room and then said a prayer. She had never even heard him say a complete sentence before and this brought her to tears. Her stories helped ease the anxiety in my own heart and mind and brought a smile as I imagined the scenes.

I thank God that even in the midst of another setback, He brought me stories of joy.

Sweet Moments

Proverbs 17:22 (ESV)

A joyful heart is good medicine,

but a crushed spirit dries up the bones.

Nursing homes and memory care centers can be very sad places, but often there are sweet or funny moments that capture my attention while I am visiting my husband. Since Mike has been there over a year now, there have been several sweet moments, tense moments, funny moments, and sad or disturbing moments. I don’t know how the staff does it day in and day out. It is definitely a special calling and they need lots of patience plus our prayers.

One morning when I arrived, Mike was sitting at a round table with about 4 others. He was looking at a magazine, one lady was coloring and then there was another lady and a gentleman just sitting and occasionally chatting with each other. This is a memory care center so all of the residents have some type of memory issue. If you haven’t had the opportunity to be around someone with a memory issue, quite often they say exactly what they are thinking with no filters or embarrassment. 

The woman who was coloring was quite serious and focused on her picture. I told her she was doing a good job. She stopped, picked up her coloring sheet, examined it closely and declared that it was “VERY good!” Her statement made me laugh and I told her she was right, it was VERY good.

While the above scenario was playing out, the other two continued to chat in short bursts. Both are kindly and from time to time the woman would reach over and pat the man on the leg. Morning snack arrived and it was so sweet how they helped each other open the package and the joy on their faces as they shared their cereal bars with each other.

One woman always tells me how sweet my husband is and goes on and on about how he will do anything for her. I’ve never seen my husband interact with anyone, other than sit beside them, but she’s so joyful when she says it that I love to hear it. 

My all-time favorite interaction was with a woman who was riffling through Mike's clothes in his wardrobe. I asked what she was doing and she said she was getting the women's clothes. I told her I had just organized them and that they were all my husband's clothes. She pulled out one of his OSU t-shirts and said "See?!" About that time a staff member came in, asked what she was doing, and told her they had staff to do that. Her response was priceless "I thought I was staff!"

I've danced in the hallway and sung songs in the Gazebo with some residents, patted hands, given hugs, and gone along with whatever disjointed conversation someone wants to have with me. It not only brings a smile to their face, but to mine also.

Although there is much sadness around me when I visit my husband, I try to focus on the positives and look for the sweet moments and joy that can be found. If my husband smiles during my visit, I count it all joy. If he can talk with me instead of just repeat the same thing over and over, I give thanks to God.

No matter our situation, there is always joy to be found. When we look for and focus on joy, our burden is lighter and there is peace in our hearts.

Tip: A joyful heart is good medicine for us, those we love, and those we encounter!

A Young Gentleman

Happy cats.

“Would you like me to put that cat food in your car?” said the kind young man. “That would be wonderful!" I replied. Then just like that he had the 30 lb. bag in the back of my car. I was very grateful. “Thank you so much! You’ve done a Good Samaritan deed today.” I said enthusiastically. The young man smiled a bit shyly, yet looked pleased that he had been helpful.  I continued to unload my grocery cart while I smiled and marveled at the gentlemanly act.

In today’s world, it takes courage to offer help. It’s sad to say that, but it really does. A woman might be offended that a man thinks she can’t handle the bag; someone else may be threatened by a stranger invading their personal space and may think they have ulterior motives. I, on the other hand, was thrilled.  I was tired from working in the vegetable and flower gardens, my back ached, and I really didn’t want to wrestle with that bag. Maybe my tiredness showed, or maybe he’s had a good example and training at home, or simply enjoys looking for ways to help others. Whatever the reason, he truly gave me an unexpected and pleasant gift. I believe we both drove away with a bit more joy than we had previously. I know I did.

I John 3:11, 17-18

"For this is the message that you have heard from

the beginning, that we should love one another. 

But if anyone has the world's goods and sees his brother in need,

yet closes his heart against him, how does God's love abide in him?

Little children, let us not love in word or talk but in deed and in truth."

Tip: We can actually rob someone else of joy if we don't allow them to assist us.

From Despair to Joy

The view when an elephant is on your chest.
It's hard to see a way around it.

There are times when despair grabs me by the throat and threatens to strangle me. Even loose clothing feels too tight, an elephant takes up residence on my chest and what is that stabbing me between my shoulder blades? Most of the time I can pinpoint what has brought on the anxiety or despair, but there are times when it strikes out of nowhere. I can feel like I am about to lose my mind. That at any moment, my marbles are all going to go skittering across the floor and I won’t be able to gather them back together. Ever felt that way?

 I recently had one of these episodes complete with a one-person pity party, crying and Kleenex. I was talking with God, pleading my case, begging Him to do something. All was quiet. Too quiet. The next day was busy, with despair lurking and threatening, but half hidden under to-do tasks.  By afternoon; however, it came out of hiding dragging the elephant with it. I grabbed my Bible and retreated to the porch. It was time to do serious battle and I needed the sword of the Spirit.

Ephesians 6:16-18a

In all circumstances take up the shield of faith, with which you can extinguish all the flaming darts of the evil one; and take the helmet of salvation, and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God, praying at all times in the Spirit, with all prayer and supplication.

Even though I was reading the Bible every day, the “evil one” was shooting flaming darts that were starting to break through and sting. My shield of faith needed reinforcing. My mind needed to stop focusing on the things that were bothering me and focus on the Lord and His word and promises. The thief desires to steal, kill and destroy (John 10:10). God desires to give peace.

Isaiah 26:3

You keep him in perfect peace

whose mind is stayed on you,

because he trusts in you.

After my time in the Word of God, I felt somewhat better, but keep in mind that feelings are fickle things. We must believe His Word to be true and act on that truth. It takes determination to set our minds on the things of God, instead of feelings, in order to persevere on the path He has placed us on. A path that may not be one we would voluntarily have chosen, yet a path that has surprising joys along the way. Joys that cannot be explained apart from God’s Holy Spirit giving them to us for no apparent reason except that He wants to bring us joy.

That is what I experienced the day after wielding His sword. No circumstances had changed, in fact, a tense situation occurred. Yet, in my inner being there was a true sense of calmness and peace plus a joy that kept bubbling up in my chest and spreading across my face. There was lightness in my step and no elephants or despair in sight. God’s word changed my despair to joy. 

(BTW - Elephants are my favorite animal, but they are mighty heavy!)

If you find yourself in despair with crushing weights holding you down and taking your breath away, turn to Jesus. Grab your Bible or use a Bible app on your phone and crawl out from under the load by the Word of God. He alone can give you perfect peace and joy that worldly cares and struggles can never take away.

Tip:  Start your day with a good dose of God’s Word.

        Take extra doses as needed.

Photos courtesy of pixabay.