My Mom

An afternoon walk

My Mom is the personification of sweetness and selflessness. She has lived her life in service to others for the majority of her 89 years. My Dad depended on her and she was right there to help him for almost 70 years.  Now that he has preceded her into Jesus' presence, there is a gaping hole in her life.

Growing up, my Mom was the one who truly made our house a wonderful home. Everyone, I mean everyone, who ever put their feet under her table to eat one of her from-scratch meals wanted to come back again. Everyday she could be found making homemade yeast dough so that we could enjoy hot rolls for supper - either to eat with the meal or to save and eat with Grandma's Molasses, a family favorite. Often when we returned home from school, there would be fresh cinnamon bow knots or coffee cake or jumbo raisin, butterscotch, or chocolate chip cookies waiting for us with a glass of milk. Of course her open arms were waiting with a warm embrace also.

Puzzle time!

She is a beautiful soul inside and out. Her patience in teaching us how to do things amazes me when I think of it today. In the kitchen, I remember pulling out the bottom drawer and standing on it to "help" her bake or cook. I'm sure we probably all did this at some point in our growing up years and she has 5 children! (Well, maybe not Hugh, he was usually outside helping Dad.) Just imagine how much faster she could have done her work without her helpers. However, she knew the importance of passing on the lessons of cooking, baking, handling yeast, how to roll out a pie crust, shape rolls, measure dry and wet ingredients, sift, cut-in, etc. and so she patiently worked with us while she accomplished her daily chores. I learned so much from her gentle instruction and ways.

Our Mom made sure that each of us, as well as, our home was clean and neat. She worked right beside us showing and teaching us how to make a bed with crisp corners, how to set a proper table, how to iron our clothes, dust, vacuum, clean a bathroom and be organized. We made our beds every day, we hung clothes on the line to dry, we helped clear the table and wash the dishes. There is a great feeling of teamwork and accomplishment when everyone is working together and it is so pleasant to live in an organized and clean environment. I loved inviting my friends to come over to play or spend the weekend. I was proud of my parents, siblings, and home. Mom welcomed whomever we brought through the door. (having asked permission, of course.)

Mom has 21 great-grands

Her 22nd great is due November 7
to my son and his wife 👶

In the summer, we would help pick the garden harvest and then sit side-by-side snapping green beans, shelling butter beans, peeling scalded tomatoes, cutting corn off the cob, cutting cucumbers or watermelon rind. All the preparation that goes into getting things ready to be canned, frozen or pickled. Mom did it all. The house and food were her responsibility. Dad took care of the farming and gardening. They both raised us. They worked well together and my brother and sisters and I had the blessing of growing up with love and responsibility entwined in a beautiful way. 

My brother played softball and Mom loved to cheer him on. We also had a co-ed church league and Mom rarely missed a game when we were playing. Mom was on hand to help with homework, bandage a skinned knee, or to soothe a broken heart. I don't seem to have very many memories of when I was really young, but I do remember Mom reading to us and tucking us in at night. Those fresh line-dried sheets smelled so good as I snuggled under the covers and received a good night kiss.

Mom's famous rolls ready for the
first Dinner on the Dairy

Still to this day, Mom remembers our likes and dislikes, as well as, those of our spouses, children and probably many others. Hugh doesn't like nuts in his strawberry jello salad and likes the inside rolls, Jennifer doesn't like raw onions, Carol doesn't like chocolate and likes the crusty rolls, Gayle loves bread pudding, Vivian drinks diet Coke, not Pepsi. (I may not be remembering all of this correctly, but Mom would! LOL!)

Mom and her daughters enjoying
 a week at the beach this summer.

Mom is a quiet, gentle woman. Someone who was in a Bible Study or some organization with her once told me that Mom didn't say much, but when she did it was well worth hearing. She doesn't waste words, she doesn't gossip, she doesn't speak ill of anyone. She is quick to listen, slow to speak as the Bible instructs us. She has a deep love of the Lord Jesus and desires to please Him in all she says and does. She has been an example of that to us throughout our lives.

Morning stretches.

As I write, Mom is spending time with one of her other daughters. I have the privilege of being with her most of the time in her home and it is a privilege. We enjoy quiet, slow mornings. Spending time with the Lord before we do a few bedside stretches and get breakfast. Sometimes we have breakfast or supper in the living room by the fire, we may watch a movie in the evening or work a jigsaw puzzle. We often take afternoon walks when the weather is mild. We sit and talk or she reclines and reads or naps. Life has definitely slowed down for Mom and that is not easy to adjust to after a life of so much activity and recent years of caring for her lifetime partner. She is at a loss. So much has changed since July.

Mom loves holding
a baby. This is Hugh's
daughter and grand-daughter.

While we are glad to be able to serve her and care for her, it is hard for her since she has been the one who has spent her life caring for her household. Suddenly she finds herself with so much time on her hands, low energy, and an aging body. It is understandable that she's finding it hard to adjust. I know she pushed herself to care for Dad at the end, even when she didn't feel well, but that's who she is. She loves serving people and has worked hard her entire life. She is a giver, that's what has always brought her joy. While a lot of it came from her labor in the kitchen, mostly it was from her heart and everyone felt that.

Just writing this has brought me to tears. Mom is not able to do as much of what she wants to do and spends more time sitting and reading. I think it is wonderful for her to have the time to do something else that she loves, but rarely had the time to do, yet I understand in a small way that this is frustrating to her. She is not able to give as much anymore and is learning to be on the receiving side. That's a big adjustment late in life. I do wish that she felt better and was able to do a bit more, but all of us are so glad to do whatever we can for her, giving back in small measure what she has given to us. Please remember her in your prayers.

I know my Mom is not perfect, but she is the perfect Mom for me and I am quite sure my siblings would say the same. I feel most blessed to have been raised by her and now I am doubly blessed that, in God's mysterious ways, I can be with her in her home. We are a help and comfort to each other and I look forward to the days, months, or years that God gives us with our dear, sweet Momma.

I love you, Mom!

Lunch at King's Bar-B-Q
after a doctor's appointment